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What is Re-parenting

Something you may see kicking around boards and forums, is the concept of re-parenting. It is supposed to be something along the lines of finding another person (or yourself) whom you can trust to develop a healthy parent-child relationship. The idea is that you get all that you were denied by your guardians during your childhood, and replace the unhealthy, and dysfunctional parenting/authority model you gained earlier, with


I cannot stress enough how dangerous it could be to put yourself in that position with someone who may in fact reenforce the dysfunctional models you are trying to replace. Even someone who is well-meaning may have their own unhealthy models that they are working from. This may also apply to intra-system re-parenting arrangements.

When one considers the track record of some organizations which have made it their business and primary concern to place abused children in the hands of those who can be trusted, it should be clear that this is not something which should be jumped into without seriously checking the waters, if at all. (It is my personal opinion that one should have, implicit in the agreement, an understanding that the person is not truly your guardian, and that they cannot force you to remain in the circumstance. However, this is just my opinion, and I'm distrusting of authority in the first place.)

Let me repeat that!

As a person in part responsible for aspects of reparenting in many reality-contexts, I cannot stress HOW important it is to be cautious about this. Nonetheless, it's sometimes the only path. The key is knowing the prospective reparenter is utterly ethical and a skilled parent in a practical sense. - BP, for the Firewheel

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